I should honestly consider it a sad state of affairs that when I get a migraine attack there will come a point that I will out of a sense of tradition pray for death, and as the custom with the ritual accept that it will not come and I just have to lay there suffering the pain of the light, the assault of sound, and the general feeling of being trapped in my own skin.
Good news is I usually wake up feeling good to be alive. Except this morning when my daughters mother goes off wondering if I am going to go to work or not, in which case I am feeling pretty good I have a job to go to.
I did a photo shoot Saturday that was so freaking awesome! I was invited by a very dear friend of mine to join her and a few other models and photographers at a wonderful Victorian mansion. I thank you soooooo much for that Lady Rosetta!
I haven’t shot anything since December when I was 20 pounds lighter, but now I am a happy fat man so I sang, and danced, and quoted Shakespeare throughout the shoot! At one point I was talking smack with some photographers that specialize in boudoir photography. I may have said something like, “Yeah… Anyone can take great pictures of naked hot girls… how well do you think you can do with a 46 year old naked fat man?” So they did. Sorta… In the modeling biz darlings it is called an implied nude. No one really wanted the full Monty if you know what I mean. So there I was in a very tastefully decorated century old boudoir in a muddy pair of rubber boots and a red beanie cap! A carefully placed red beanie cap. (Earlier I was standing in a marsh getting out door pictures taken of my 20,000 Leagues under the Sea inspired diving suit)
Because when I model anymore it is to get very good quality pictures of the various costumes I create and not so much fashion I also did a great set with my Jedi suit because the only other male model showed up with a Darth Vader suit. We got a ton of pictures of us having lightsabre battles in the streets of St. Augustine. That and playing basketball with one of the lady models.
But yesterday… jeez.. somewhere between doing the colors and the darks during my standard Sunday laundry fetish activities the mild beat of distant drums got much closer and then the Zulus, normally bunch of guys I love and respect, started running rampant in my skull. I didn’t pray for death until they started partying with the Apaches. (This should be taken as a warning not to fall asleep watching The Deadliest Warrior)
But you know what? It is good to be alive! I just read a report on how nicotine is linked to depression. Here I spent all of these years smoking because I thought nicotine was my anti-depressant! There were times I actually started smoking again because I thought it would help me get me over a slump. Talk about using an anchor to help you float!
Bummer too. I didn’t get to golf yesterday.
But by the grace of God, smokes and migraine can’t stop me from being alive enough to see The Big Bang Theory tonight and play golf this Friday.